it’s pretty much a classic case of you give and we take. we take your personal information in order to respond to your request, to conduct our business, and to provide you with the best possible products, services and experience. we use the generic statistical and demographic information for the purposes of system administration and to monitor the level of activity on our site. i mean, why else would we want this stuff? we might share your personally identifiable information, as well as aggregated statistics about pages viewed on our site and demographic information, with other members of the singani 63 “family” of companies–it’s totally up to us!–and with service providers that provide support services to us—such as fulfilling orders, delivering packages, and services related to the design, maintenance, and improvement of this site and our database and related systems—or that help us market our products and services. but really, doesn’t using words like “family” make you feel better? by the way, service providers/third parties who perform services on our behalf are contractually restricted from using your information in any manner other than in helping us to provide you with the products and services available from singani 63 , but you can’t control everything everybody does in this world, can you? no, you can’t. if you provide us with your consent, we may share your personal information with our affiliates and business partners with whom we have joint marketing arrangements. if you do not want us to share your personal information with our marketing affiliates and business partners, then please let us know by contacting us at email@example.com. we may also, in certain instances, disclose your personally identifiable information when we have reason to believe that it is necessary to identify you, contact you, or bring legal action–which is really fun and expensive!—to protect your rights or the rights of singani 63 or others. we may also disclose your personally identifiable information when you ask us to do so or when we believe it is necessary to comply with applicable laws, police investigations, or in legal proceedings where disclosure of such information is relevant and permitted by law. but that’s really it.
it’s like this: if we link you to shit, it doesn’t mean we endorse it, and when you link to that shit, you’ve left our site (where you are safe and warm), and we can’t help what happens to you, and if something does happen to you, it ain’t on us. every site has it’s own rules, and they may not be as cool as we are, so watch out. also it seems like we went over this before.
you not supposed to be here if you’re under the legal drinking age for your locality although we don’t understand that at all what with the shit that’s on tv and david ortiz dropping the f-bomb at that red sox game. but, that being said, don’t help some kid get on this site. the site does not target children or provide products or services for use by children (we’re not even really fans of children, to be honest. they’re expensive and noisy). we can’t have kids here (because of the booze, maybe?) and we don’t want their info, because we do not knowingly collect information from persons under the legal drinking age. if we find out there’s a kid on this site, they’re toast.
do we want to protect our shit and your information? hells yes. so we’re using secure sockets layer (ssl) to encrypt it, so only we can pore over your information and find out what you’re really up to. if that’s still not enough, look at the bottom status bar of your browser window. if you see an unbroken key or a closed lock (depending on your browser) the ssl is active and your information is secure. most browsers offer additional security alerts, as well, but we find that the very word “browser” makes us feel very insecure indeed. with regard to “overall security”, we always use industry standard encryption technologies when transferring and receiving data exchanged with our site, and we all know how well that works. the facilities that house our servers are physically secured to protect against the loss, misuse or alteration of all data and information collected, although we have absolutely no idea where they are–they won’t tell us. maybe they’re in orbit? additionally, we are asking all our customers to “take measures” to help protect their personal information, including the following: • install the latest security updates and anti-virus software on your computer to help prevent malware and viruses • reset your e-mail account password • use complex passwords (a minimum of 7 alpha/numeric case sensitive characters) • do not use the same password on more than one website • do not share your password with others • sign out/log off website sessions so that your session is closed and cannot be accessed by another user on the same computer, especially when using a public computer or terminal • visit these additional resources: • http://www.us-cert.gov/cas/tips/
we are in your life now, and we are never going to let you forget it. if you don’t want that, opt-out: singani63.com provides the option to remove your information (email, regular mail, fax (ha!), text message, or telephone) from our database at any time. if you are on our promotional lists and would like to be removed, simply send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org with “unsubscribe” as the subject line and we will totally respect your choice (even though it’s wrong) in wanting to unsubscribe to marketing communications from then on. please allow up to 10 days for your email to be removed from our database. did we say days? we meant years.
you may come in contact with websites, e-mails or texts that try to lure/seduce/cajole/browbeat you into providing personal information with the offer of a singani 63 gift card. there is no such thing! singani 63 does not sponsor these offers nor are we affiliated with the promotion originators. we’re hermits! if you become aware of any potentially fraudulent activity on a website or in an e-mail or text, please forward the information to email@example.com so that we can follow up. we take these matters so seriously you wouldn’t fucking believe it.
this “policy” would replace all previous disclosures we may have provided you about our information practices, if we’d ever had such a thing before, which we haven’t. we do reserve the right to change this policy as often as the weather if we fucking want to, and to apply any changes to information previously collected, as permitted by the actual law, dude. if there are material changes to this policy or our information practices “change” in the future, they will be posted on our website as appropriate and/or will be addressed in an email message to previously registered visitors, and will be effective from the nanosecond of posting. singani63.com is operated in the united states, which is an island off the coast of manhattan.